This just in from seer, Steve Jobs:
“It doesn’t matter how good or bad the product is, the fact is that people don’t read anymore,” Markoff quotes the Apple CEO. “Forty percent of the people in the U.S. read one book or less last year. The whole conception is flawed at the top because people don’t read anymore.”
And THAT is so flawed. So wrong. It’s been 15 days of the New Year and I’ve been reading like mad, yo. Suck on this Jobs. Here’s my 2008 reading list, sucka.
1) My AT&T Statement
2) “You have 7 missed calls” message on my Treo
3) Take-out menus for: Rice, I Shabeen Madiba, Ici AND Bonita.
4) Directions for my rice cooker (I was making lentils, which is NOT rice)
5) Directions on the package of lentils
6) My overdue AT&T Statement
7) “The Art of Celebration” the postcard invitation for a Graywolf party.
8) Emails – duh
9) Jury Duty Notice
10) Signage: “Women’s Room;” “Don’t Cross;” “Restrooms;” “Please respect the neighbors and be quiet when exiting the bar;” “Only flush toilet paper;” “Elliptical trainer reserved for 7:00pm class;” “Please turn off cellphones.”
11) Message on cellphone: “Phone now turned off.”
12) Notice from Collection Agency re: overdue AT&T bill
13) “Grand Opening.”
14) Note from downstairs neighbor apologizing for noise
15) Note from landlord reminding me to pay rent
16) Note from mail-person to please empty my overstuffed mailbox
17) Note from little sister asking if I have any Ambien
That’s like 17 more books than a lot of people I know have read. That’s like 17 more books than Steve Jobs has read in his ENTIRE life. Damn. I’m more literacated than I realized.