Thank you, anonymous, for the Flintstones. I’m assuming it was you, but please let me know if I am mistaken, and a different anonymous person gave the stage manager at Joe’s Pub vitamins to pass along to me. Though, that is doubtful. She refused to tell me who they came from. Two people, she said. Which two people, I asked. I can’t tell you, I promised. Obviously, we had to fire her. I can’t abide by such a strong moral compass. I actually ate the Flintstones during the next show and gave some to friends, who, when I told them who gave them to me, worried they were laced with poison. I suppose I’m writing now to tell you that we did not die and to thank you for not trying to kill us. I am still sick, though, so next time, please leave antibiotics. You know what else is good? Advil Cold and Sinus. That stuff is amazing. Zinc lozenges work, too. Oh, and also Adderall if you can get your hands on it, because I have so much work to do. But, Adderall keeps you up, right? So maybe toss in a small package of Lunesta or Ambien?

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